14 Things Malayalis Need Freedom From

As much as we Malayalis love God’s Own Country, there are few aspects we absolutely despise. We are not talking about political agenda or environmental degradation. Let’s focus on just the personal aspects that affect our day-to-day existence in this piece. Here are few things that are holding us back and that somehow refuses to leave Kerala.

Nosy Neighbours

And their family’s gossipmongers. They are the worst because they’ll do anything to get news and spice it up with extra masala and broadcast it all over the neighbourhood.

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Current Cut

The major cause of high BP. It’s 2019 already, didn’t we perfect 24/7 supply of electricity yet?

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Flood Warnings

The Monsoons in Kerala should stop ruining people’s lives every year. It’s scary, you know.

Courtesy: Business Today

Chooral Vadi

Our mothers’ favourite weapon to attack us is the worst invention ever.

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Kalyana Brokers

They are here to ruin lives, not create them. No Sir and Madam, we don’t want to get married to your list of pengutikals or chekkamars so that you can get a nice commission when you get a couple married.

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Astrologers

Our parents are your die-hard fans. We are not. Take note of that, dear astrologer.

Slow Wi-Fi

The internet in Kerala is so slow that getting a 4g connection is the only viable option.

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Cringe-worthy Malayalam Serials

Our brains die a slow death because of the over-dramatic background scores and the extra slo-mo in the middle of a dramatic scene.

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Trouble Causing Teachers

Ayoo, shalyangal! They make lives in school extremely miserable. They’re born to cause trouble by being a pain in the neck.

College Uniforms

College students are young adults so treat them like one!

Bus Racing

An average of 11 people die everyday in road accidents in Kerala. And a few less speeding busses should help bring that number down.

Roadside Garbage

Kerala is beautiful except when there’s shit loads of garbage at every single junction. Time we did something about it.

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Special Class

ALL students hate ‘special class’ on a Saturday. Why this kolaveri, teacher?

Freakenmaar

Spiked, coloured hair, loose jeans with underwear display, colourful shoes, and kajal worn – all characteristics of Kerala’s ‘freaks’. May god bless you!

Have we missed on more? Let us know in the comments below.

Aishwarya Gopinathhttps://pinklungicom.wordpress.com/
A foodie at heart, an aspiring novelist, and an enthusiastic writer by nature, I love to dig deep into culture and lifestyle of the place and people around me. I hope to make people cry, laugh, smile, angry, and satisfied with my writing.

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